Hey guys!!! We all want to grow in life but very few of us know the true meaning of growth. In this world of instant gratification, it’s very hard to examine whether you are really growing or not. Whether you have achieved Real Growth or Fake Growth. So today, let’s learn what is Fake and Real Growth in our favourite, Expeknow style!
While doing personal development work on yourself, it’s very easy to be tricked into thinking that you are growing where actually you are not growing. This is the era where everyone wants instant gratification and just because of it, we don’t fix the root cause of our problems. We now happily use quick fixes and think that we are growing where actually we are not.
Like I have said in my previous blog without root fixing, the quick fixes don’t work. Deep issues aren’t resolved by surface level stuff.
Real Growth is similar to root fixing. When you experience Real Growth, the issue becomes a Non-issue. You stop caring about the issue. You remove that issue completely from yourself and you no longer exert will power to control the issue.
Suppose there is a guy who is shy. He is really ashamed of being shy and now he wants to be truly confident. What do you think would Growth mean to him? Becoming the Alpha male or to stop caring about shyness at all.
Here, becoming the Alpha male is an external solution for this guy, whereas stop caring about shyness is an internal fix. Here, Real Growth will happen when he will completely stop caring about shyness and use zero will to control this part of life rather than becoming an alpha male and focusing all his energy in this part of his life.
Let’s take another example. If you have neediness for relationships, what do you think you should do? Should you go in relationships to fulfill the need or should you destroy the need altogether? Yeah, going into relationship is an external solution whereas destroying the need is an internal fix.
In business, if you have a tendency to be the best, the solution is not to be the best, it is to stop caring about competition at all. You see, fixing the problem from root. Don’t look out for some external solutions, find what’s the problem inside and fix it.
When you experience Real Growth, you become less reactive to that issue, you become calmer in that area of life and your emotional responses change.
By now, you would have understood the meaning of Real Growth so now let’s see what does Fake Growth mean.
Fake Growth is finding an external solution or fix for whatever problem we have. That external solution can be a material, circumstance or situation. In simple words, Fake Growth is focusing on success and achievements. For example: More money, girlfriend, boyfriend,career, children, an ideal image etc.
While doing personal development, always remember that the real issue is inside you and it’s where the work has to happen.
Having a girlfriend/boyfriend doesn’t fix the issue of neediness and loneliness. It’s just an achievement and it puts a mask on the real problem. Once you lose the girlfriend/boyfriend, you are back to square one.
Similarly, having 100 million dollars doesn’t mean you won’t be having fear of losing money. Maybe you have successfully masked that fear with all your current money but as the money will go, the mask will also remove and then you will be having that fear again.
To fix the issues from root, you must be willing to fix the problem matter how much time it takes. Sometimes, a single problem take 2 years so patience is required. You have to do some internal work to solve the problems from root.
So, always fix the problems from the root. Start fixing what’s in you. Real Growth happens when you start working on your issues from root. Don’t use a mask to hide your issues. Fix your issues from root and make the issue a non-issue.
1. Quick fixes trick is into believing that we are growing where actually we are not growing.
2. Without root fixing, the quick fixes for a problem doesn’t work.
3. Real Growth is making the Issue a Non-issue.
4. Real Growth happens when you no longer have to put your will power to control
5. When you experience Real Growth, you become less reactive, calmer and feel emotional response change in problematic area of your life.
6. Fake Growth is finding an external fix or circumstance for whatever problem we have.
7. In Fake Growth, we focus on success and achievements.
8. When you try to grow in an area of your life, try to grow from deep within so that the issue becomes a Non-issue for rest of your life.
9. Try to experience Real Growth rather than going for some Fake Growth.
Alright, this is it. I hope you liked my blog. Like this blog and share it with someone who needs it. Subscribe to our newsletter for getting these awesome blogs in your beautiful inbox. Experience Real Growth. This is Atul and you are at Expeknow!